Thursday, January 11, 2007

Where are the men?

So let me pause all of the introspective rambling and ministry talk to address something else that is annoying at least hundreds of Christian young women.

Lets say you are in a crowd of 200 Christians between the ages of 18 and 35.
About 90 of those people will probably be men. Maybe less.
Of the proposed 90 men, about 20 will be between 18 and 21.
About 50 will be 28 or older.
About 20 will be between the ages of 22 and 27.

Of the 90 men, about 25 will be single.
8 of the single men will be in the 18-21 bracket.
4 will be in the 22-28 bracket.
The rest will be 28 or older.

Granted, I made up these stats, but I'm basically reconstructing my observations at different conferences, seminary, life, etc. And everywhere I go, Christian women in their early-mid 20s are wondering where the single Christian men in their 20s are. The craziest thing is that of the small number of young Christian guys, a shocking number of them are married or in serious relationships (often with girls in the 18-21 bracket). Apparently we already missed the boat, and now we have to wait for the next one.

Theoretically, some of these relationships that are already in progress will fail, but Christians tend to marry pretty early. It seems like our only hope is to wait for the guys who will come to Christ after sowing their wild oats. In South Africa a guy we were talking to said that women today don't want to get married, and the women at the table loudly objected. Its not that we don't want to get married, its that we're not willing to make a beeline for one of the 4 single guys regardless of compatibility or shared interests. And plus, if you are a women in ministry your options are also limited to those who aren't opposed to/intimidated by women in ministry.

Jackie and I always say that if we weren't Christians life would just be depressing, because we can have faith that God has plans for us. And let me be clear that I know I'm only 23, and I am finally in a place where I enjoy being single. Still, I am perfectly happy with my '98 Civic and plan to drive it for another 4 or 5 years, but that doesn't stop me from following the developments in hybrids. So hopefully in the next five years or so I'll buy a hybrid and find the right guy?

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